Yesterday I listened to 63 oral finals, calculated grades and had got authorization from my team leader. (Excel and I have a love/hate relationship going on.) This morning I entered the grades into the computer, and this afternoon I signed the final copies in the secretary's office. FREEDOM!!!
I had a chance for an hour-long post-lunch nap, and I took it. Every time I sleep, I dream. In today's episode, I was inside an excel spreadsheet and each cell was bordered with eight feet of beige curtains like the ones in my bedroom. Two Nazgûl were each confined in a cell, and I had to quickly cut, copy, and paste them into the appropriate row so I could capture all 12 before they could realize what was happening and chop me down with their giant black swords.
Grading is stressful.
Clearly my subconscious is telling me it's time to go see 'The Hobbit.' I'm so excited to finally get some free time! I'm going to be changing up a few things on my blog. There should be updates fairly soon!
Friday, December 28, 2012
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Following a Typhoon
The term is almost over, and I'm looking at a 6-7 week break - with tons to do! Some friends and I decided to go to Thailand for a little over a week, join some friends doing mission work, and see the Indian Ocean and elephants!
Even MORE exciting is the decision to go to the Philippines. On December 4, Typhoon Bopha swept through the south eastern Philippines, swallowing hundreds of people without leaving a trace and destroying the homes of over 400,000 people. A small group of teachers and exchange students at our university are from the Philippines, including our building manager who grew up a few hours away from the worst of the destruction. 300 fishermen from her city sailed out the morning of the 4th, and no one has seen or heard anything of them since then.
You know, vacations are great, but I would much rather do something useful and impactful with my time and energy. My parents taught and modeled that times of crisis are times of action. Relief work has always been really important to me, but I haven't been able to respond much during college. I'm currently unencumbered by school or work, and I can literally just pick myself up and go help! A few of my friends and I are going to General Santos toward the end of January and stay in a "cottage" (it's on stilts!) and join a local church's feeding ministry. We're going to do whatever needs doing - feeding, cooking, cleaning, building, clearing demolished buildings. (For my nurse-moms: yes, I'll track down a tetanus shot and mosquito nets!) I can't even describe how excited I am to be able to go do this!!
Besides the relief work, there are many reasons I'm excited to go to the Philippines - the music, the sea shells (I've been a collector for years - it's a deal), the countryside, and the proximity to Papua New Guinea. My great-grandparents met there while they were doing mission work, and I've always wanted to go. I don't think that will happen this trip, but there's a good chance I'll be able to spend time with people who are currently involved in missions there.
I'm headed down with three awesome believers who are ready and willing for anything to happen. Please pray that we can find cheap flights (my task in the next few days). We anticipate that our needs will be small, but funds are limited, and we're headed into an area full of astronomical need. Please pray that we can truly aid and encourage the victims of this awful storm, that we adjust our lives and plans to love them in the way they need us to, and that God's glory shines in spite of our limits!
Even MORE exciting is the decision to go to the Philippines. On December 4, Typhoon Bopha swept through the south eastern Philippines, swallowing hundreds of people without leaving a trace and destroying the homes of over 400,000 people. A small group of teachers and exchange students at our university are from the Philippines, including our building manager who grew up a few hours away from the worst of the destruction. 300 fishermen from her city sailed out the morning of the 4th, and no one has seen or heard anything of them since then.
You know, vacations are great, but I would much rather do something useful and impactful with my time and energy. My parents taught and modeled that times of crisis are times of action. Relief work has always been really important to me, but I haven't been able to respond much during college. I'm currently unencumbered by school or work, and I can literally just pick myself up and go help! A few of my friends and I are going to General Santos toward the end of January and stay in a "cottage" (it's on stilts!) and join a local church's feeding ministry. We're going to do whatever needs doing - feeding, cooking, cleaning, building, clearing demolished buildings. (For my nurse-moms: yes, I'll track down a tetanus shot and mosquito nets!) I can't even describe how excited I am to be able to go do this!!
Besides the relief work, there are many reasons I'm excited to go to the Philippines - the music, the sea shells (I've been a collector for years - it's a deal), the countryside, and the proximity to Papua New Guinea. My great-grandparents met there while they were doing mission work, and I've always wanted to go. I don't think that will happen this trip, but there's a good chance I'll be able to spend time with people who are currently involved in missions there.
I'm headed down with three awesome believers who are ready and willing for anything to happen. Please pray that we can find cheap flights (my task in the next few days). We anticipate that our needs will be small, but funds are limited, and we're headed into an area full of astronomical need. Please pray that we can truly aid and encourage the victims of this awful storm, that we adjust our lives and plans to love them in the way they need us to, and that God's glory shines in spite of our limits!
Saturday, December 15, 2012
The Prayer of the Children
I would like to dedicate this to the people
of Portland, Connecticut, and Xinyang,
especially to the children.
Friday, December 14, 2012
Facing Gunfire at Christmas
I've been on a writing hiatus for quite a while now due to finals, rehearsals, food poisoning, and late-night Chinese classes. I have so many wonderful things to talk about - a trip to the grottoes in Luoyang, sharing Jesus with students, teaching about the meaning of Christmas, and the many adventures I'm having with students and fellow teachers.
But unfortunately, what's causing me to break my writing-silence are the shootings in Portland and Connecticut. For the last two weeks I've been telling my students about the celebration of peace and joy that is Christmas - the feeling in the air, the suspense of children, and the kindness of strangers. Then I read about the shooting at Clackamas Town Center, MY mall, the place where I go for everything - work, studying for school, hanging out with friends, preparing for life, food. It's one of my comfort zones. Also, it's really close to my house and my high school. When I heard, I immediately began shuffling through the list of everyone I know who works there, including all my coworkers at WHBM, my personal shoppers, and my favorite baristas, not to mention the people I know who shop there. At CHRISTMAS TIME.
Then there was the shooting in Connecticut. I don't even know how to comment on that. How can you make sense of the shooting of children? There's no sense to be had. Just awful, awful pain.
And yet - unless we personally know the victims, our cycle of grief is removed a step, and we [referring to all American residents and citizens with the collective 'we'] leap from shock to anger in a single bound. Anger is easier than grief. We then try to use these horrific tragedies as a platform to enact political change. But, as with anything political, we can hardly utter an idea without another person feeling nobly inclined to rip our throats out. So what do we get? Devastating murders and citizens who respond with contention and slashing words.
Gun control. The first response is always gun control. Here's my thought: if a person is a cutter, and you take away the knife, obviously they can no longer cut their body -- but they still carry self-destruction in their hearts. This is a one-dimensional result. If we want to protect our citizens, why don't we immediately think of increasing services for those who hurt and increasing security for those who are healthy? Probably because it's more expensive and feels less productive than passing a law. Every time we pass a law, we set a precedent. Currently, I presume that my government wants to protect me. If armed police invade my house, I know they're on my side. History shows us that this isn't always the case. Please, please remember your global history lessons: what happens when the government has all the firepower and the people are defenseless? Simple answer: bad stuff. The hurried changes in law made in response to pain can lay the ground work for future governmental action that no one wants.
In another forum, a complete stranger made a cutting comment, asking how I 'attended the needs' of other people. I think this is a good thing for all people to think about. In the past 10 years, I've been a photographer, a barista, a singer, a cook, a student, a teacher, and I've sold a whole lot of clothes. I have witnessed the happiness, pain, confusion, disillusionment, surprise, and tears of other people in every one of those jobs. (Okay, I've never seen a cook cry, but that's the only exception.) Distant husbands, fear for children, the ache of loneliness and being left behind, the quiet dullness of being unnoticed, and the even quieter panic of feeling alone in your fear - you see it at different levels every day of your life if you look at people's faces. Look at people! Empathize! Use your face to communicate that you see them. Speak more kindly. A genuine 'How are you?' will prompt a true response. If you aren't getting a real response, you need to learn how to really ask. Then when they tell you, listen to what they say!
But unfortunately, what's causing me to break my writing-silence are the shootings in Portland and Connecticut. For the last two weeks I've been telling my students about the celebration of peace and joy that is Christmas - the feeling in the air, the suspense of children, and the kindness of strangers. Then I read about the shooting at Clackamas Town Center, MY mall, the place where I go for everything - work, studying for school, hanging out with friends, preparing for life, food. It's one of my comfort zones. Also, it's really close to my house and my high school. When I heard, I immediately began shuffling through the list of everyone I know who works there, including all my coworkers at WHBM, my personal shoppers, and my favorite baristas, not to mention the people I know who shop there. At CHRISTMAS TIME.
Then there was the shooting in Connecticut. I don't even know how to comment on that. How can you make sense of the shooting of children? There's no sense to be had. Just awful, awful pain.
And yet - unless we personally know the victims, our cycle of grief is removed a step, and we [referring to all American residents and citizens with the collective 'we'] leap from shock to anger in a single bound. Anger is easier than grief. We then try to use these horrific tragedies as a platform to enact political change. But, as with anything political, we can hardly utter an idea without another person feeling nobly inclined to rip our throats out. So what do we get? Devastating murders and citizens who respond with contention and slashing words.
Gun control. The first response is always gun control. Here's my thought: if a person is a cutter, and you take away the knife, obviously they can no longer cut their body -- but they still carry self-destruction in their hearts. This is a one-dimensional result. If we want to protect our citizens, why don't we immediately think of increasing services for those who hurt and increasing security for those who are healthy? Probably because it's more expensive and feels less productive than passing a law. Every time we pass a law, we set a precedent. Currently, I presume that my government wants to protect me. If armed police invade my house, I know they're on my side. History shows us that this isn't always the case. Please, please remember your global history lessons: what happens when the government has all the firepower and the people are defenseless? Simple answer: bad stuff. The hurried changes in law made in response to pain can lay the ground work for future governmental action that no one wants.
In another forum, a complete stranger made a cutting comment, asking how I 'attended the needs' of other people. I think this is a good thing for all people to think about. In the past 10 years, I've been a photographer, a barista, a singer, a cook, a student, a teacher, and I've sold a whole lot of clothes. I have witnessed the happiness, pain, confusion, disillusionment, surprise, and tears of other people in every one of those jobs. (Okay, I've never seen a cook cry, but that's the only exception.) Distant husbands, fear for children, the ache of loneliness and being left behind, the quiet dullness of being unnoticed, and the even quieter panic of feeling alone in your fear - you see it at different levels every day of your life if you look at people's faces. Look at people! Empathize! Use your face to communicate that you see them. Speak more kindly. A genuine 'How are you?' will prompt a true response. If you aren't getting a real response, you need to learn how to really ask. Then when they tell you, listen to what they say!
All of the sudden, that person isn't invisible anymore. They aren't on their own. They can square their shoulders and face another day. This is how we 'attend the needs' of others.
As I've shared the Christmas story these past two weeks, I've said repeatedly that Jesus was born poor because God was showing that he wanted ALL the people, from the uneducated local shepherds to the highly educated powerful kings from distant lands. This Christmas we have a unique opportunity to grieve with our country in the light of these terrible shootings. As representative of Christ, our job isn't to tell people, 'It's okay, God can fix it.' Is that true? Of course! But if our only response to grief is knowledge-based, or anger-based, then people don't see God's heart of empathy for people.
The willingness to see one another, and in this time, to grieve with one another - friends and strangers alike - shows that Christ is alive in us. God is not absent just because evil is present. I encourage everyone (including myself now) to step away from political discussion for at least a week following these events. Be especially encouraging and thoughtful of those who have a lot of vocational human interaction: teachers, pastors, baristas (the pastors of non-church-goers), and waiters. Let's use the light of gunfire to see the lives of people around us. Go attend to people.
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