Giving Thanks on Thanksgiving

I've been told (repeatedly) that being an expatriate* during the holidays can be difficult, sad, and lonely.  Luckily for me, I shaped this week's lesson around the Thanksgiving holiday.  I told the story of the pilgrims and the Mayflower, the starvation of the first winter, the extension of the Native Americans, and the joy of harvest. 

[Yes, I skipped the part about wars, massacres, and smallpox-ridden blankets.  I thought that would be confusing...]

All week, I've been emphasizing the importance of thankfulness, of recognizing what we're grateful for and sharing it with others.  According to teacher-training (thank you MAT) I explained the concept, modeled the concept, and then the students talked about it.  Then the students shared what they were thankful for.  Toward the end of class, all my students wrote down what they were thankful for about each other.  Of course some classes liked it more than others, but ALL my students eagerly grabbed their papers.  It was a little bit torturous to look at pictures of turkey, cornbread stuffing, mashed potatoes, and pie pie pie right before lunch, but so fun to explain MY traditional foods to my students!

Every Thanksgiving, we sit around the food, silently salivating (hey, that's an alliteration!), while mom makes us all say what we're thankful for.  Sometimes we have specific things we're thankful for and we're excited to say, and sometimes it feels painfully awkward as we say, "I'm thankful for my family and friends."  Of course, it's always true - it just feels a little strange to say as they're sitting right there looking at you.

This Thanksgiving, I'm away from home, but I’m filled with sincere and specific thankfulness.  It’s been a fun awareness, so I thought I’d share my list this year.

1.   I’m thankful to be in China.  It’s different. It’s challenging. It’s constantly surprising and seldom familiar.  BUT – I have the chance to taste, see, touch, smell, DO hundreds of things that millions of people can only dream of.  I see things daily that teach me more and more about what it is to be human, our commonalities, our differences.  It’s not strictly empathy – it’s more like taking a walk around the elephant, understanding how good people can come to love such a different way of life.  It’s not fast, and it’s seldom easy, but I feel like I understand people more.

2.   I’m thankful for the internet.  When the world seems VERY Chinese, I’m a few clicks away from thousands of people who speak my language.  I can see my nephew’s time in the state cross-country meet.  I can see my high school friend’s wedding, a picture of my favorite coffee shop, and funny comics with American humor.  (Guess what? Different cultures have different kinds of humor!)

3.    I'm thankful for my mother.  Even though she was decidedly NOT enthusiastic about my decision to move to China at first, she has chosen to love and support me anyways.  She's been a consistent source of encouragement and joy to me over the past few months.  In my down times, she has never come close to saying 'I told you so.'  I love you momma.

4.  I'm thankful for whoever sold my sister her ipad.  It was so good to see her face and be able to join my family at the Thanksgiving table!!

5.  I'm thankful for the new friends I've made since arriving here.  There is a handful of fantastic women here who are like-minded in so many ways.  Articulate, intelligent, fun, hardworking, patient, creative, and adventurous. I feel very lucky to be in this mix.

6.  I've always thought that I was a LOT like my dad.  As I've talked with him about my travels and experiences, I find us laughing at the same things, and generally responding in similar ways - it's so fun to share what I do and see with him!  As always, he's been my advisor and supporter, but it's so much fun to share this new slice of similarity. (Oo! Another alliteration!)  I learn about the people I love even more deeply when I see them react to the places where our lives intersect.  Talking with my dad since I've been here has added a new dimension to our relationship that I've loved.

7.  I'm glad to be writing again.  I had forgotten how much I like it, and how fun it is to share with other people.  Sometimes I laugh at the variety of tone I take, and sometimes I wince, wishing for more consistency.  My writing is like my wardrobe, my coffee, and my moods; varied, shifting, changing on a whim, subtle, brazen, bold, nuanced, and always me.  I've always felt an affinity for the ocean. It's always moving, wave on wave, pushing forward, swooping back, tides coming in and tides going out.  A dark sky makes the water black and angry. A blue sky makes it green, giddy, and buoyant.  And a night sky makes it a powerful, silvery mystery.  Even in constant change, it's consistently true to itself.
8.  I'm thankful for American standards of hygiene.  [See other posts for details.]
9.  I'm thankful for Chinese familiarity between friends.  It appeals to me.  Every time I meet my friend Maggie, we hold both hands when we say hello.  When my students take me out, they take me by the hand.  When I'm crossing a busy street, I hold my friend's hand in a semi-protective way.  It's a common, affectionate thing that I really love.  Touch is one of my love languages. =)

I feel like there should be 10...and frankly, there are SO MANY things that I'm thankful for, but thanksgiving was a WEEK ago, and this post is coming so late!  Oh yes:

10.  I'm thankful for the blogging venue of writing.  I track my 'pageviews' gleefully
whenever I post new things.  I'm sorry it's been so long since I've posted!!


Happy (Belated) Thanksgiving!




*An expatriate (in abbreviated form, expat) is a person temporarily or permanently residing in a country and culture other than that of the person's upbringing.