Awkward Moments

I expected to experience new things in China: tastes, smells, sounds, sights, confusions.  But equally new and surprisingly unexpected are the awkward exchanges between me and Chinese people.  Something will happen, the Chinese person will walk away, and my inner child is left squishing up her face saying, 'Wait. What? Hold on now - WHAT just happened?'  Then I tuck away my anecdote, pat the inner child on the head, and go on with my day.

Sound a little vague?  Lemme 'splain.

I hate my phone, but at least
it's purple and sparkly.

During my first week here, I went to the store with my friend while he bought a phone.  He was busy with the culture student (college students with AWESOME English and extra knowledge of American culture who often help us translate) so I practiced my pantomime skills and discussed the price of iphones in America with the store employees.  The girls got really excited and asked to take pictures with me (of course).  They pulled me really close - friendship in China is high contact - talked about my makeup and then one brave soul leaned in close...and very gently touched my eyelashes.  Then I heard Michael (the culture student gasp) and yell 'No!' and I thought, 'Yup, that happened.'  Poor guy.  I thought he was gonna have a heart attack.

China was a closed country for so long that the sight of foreigners is still relatively new.  People are used to seeing the laowai on campus, but a trip into town reminds me that I'm definitely the 'other.'  I constantly see people sneaking pictures of their white friend (ie: they saw me on the street) or suddenly grabbing me for pictures.  Sometimes people push their young children at me for pictures, like a tourist attraction.  The brave ones hold up two shaky fingers in a peace sign and stare wide-eyed into the camera.  And yes, I've had children run away in fear.  Who does that?  Geez, in MY country we only forced children to take pictures with fat old men in red furry suits or people dressed like giant bunnies.  Because that's not frightening at all....

---> The next section is about a squattie potty.  Avoid if you are faint of heart or an overly visual thinker.

I think the most awkward moment I've had with a stranger so far was at a rest stop on the way to Xi'an. Squattie potties are inherently awkward, and usually filthy and smelly. (I will never complain at an American rest stop ever again.)  Sometimes there are no doors on the stalls, or they don't lock, or won't shut.  Depending on the line and sense of urgency, sometimes you just suck it up and discreetly take care of business.  (Chinese women don't seem to care, so you adapt, right?)  Anyways, I was traveling to Xi'an when this very situation presented itself.  My priority was all about completing business, so I opted to blitz through the crowd to a stall without a door.  A Chinese woman took that opportunity to stare straight into my eyes....and I couldn't get away.  I tried to shoot her a look that communicated something along the lines of 'Surely this is a mistake...' But she maintained a direct and intent study of my face.  The. Whole. Time.  All of my friends stood with their mouths hanging open, and tried to build a human shield as best they could.  I feel like all people know that direct eye contact is not okay when someone is...busy.  Utterly flabbergasting!  Back on the bus I was speechless, (a miracle!) but that's okay, because my friends told the whole bus....groan...  Yeah, maybe I shouldn't post this, but it was SO absurd!

---> End of the potty part.

I was back at my favorite coffee shop the other day, and a teenage girl found me interesting, so she watched me from the table next to me.  She tried to talk to me, but she didn't speak any English, so she kept staring.  Then she walked over to the wall divider by my table, rested her chin on her hand, her face maybe 20 inches away from my face, watching.  Maybe 20 minutes went by as I tried to work.  So very disconcerting.  I go to this shop to get away from people who could distract me from my grading.  Focus fail.  In hindsight, the girl may have been a little mentally impaired, but it wasn't glaringly apparent.  Still, the proximity made it really awkward.



All kinds of strange things happen here, but a special few leave me with that unique, slightly blank feeling and the thought, 'Yes. Yes, that just happened.'  Some of them are purely cultural differences.  Others happen because people allow curiosity to override manners.  I'm sure I've been guilty of that more than once in my life, and I'm sure people could easily provide examples!  At the end of the day you just put your face in your hands, laugh, take your inner child by the hand and move along.